In honor of this weeks accomplishments in Washington, D.C., I give you my top ten reasons that your state should secede from the union.
10. Ohio can go to war with Michigan to make us take back Toledo.
9. Change the name of your capitol to something really cool, like LMAO, California.
8. In sparsely populated states, like Montana, the first person to declare himself king will get to make all the decisions.
7. Finally oust baseball as your national sport and make it something like Farmville or Euchre.
6. We can write a new Bill of Rights to include things like “The right of husbands to nap at the time and place of their choosing shall not be infringed.”
5. Northern states will make a fortune selling Texas all the lumber it will need to build the world’s longest wall.
4. Get rid of fiat money and use something tangable, like M&Ms, as currency.
3. Founding fathers with hipper names like Kid Rock and Whoopi Goldberg.
2. Give Washington, D.C. to China and call it even.
and the number 1 reason your state should secede from the union…
1. 49 heads of state will get to shun meetings with Obama.
How about you? Anything to add?